It was cooler than it is today five years ago, but the sky was the same. A little overcast, but sunny, and it felt grey. A few days earlier we had celebrated my father-out-law’s (former father-in-law) 65th birthday at a fancy restaurant. A fancy restaurant where Aidan and I got food poisoning. My 10-month-old had… Continue reading 5 Years Later
Aidan is gone for ten days. Markus has been gone for five and will return late tomorrow. I find myself with an entire day to myself and knowing exactly what to do. I slept until nearly 10:00 this morning. Once normal, or even early, this is unheard of these days when 8:00 seems like a… Continue reading Gift of Time
My parents separated for the first time when I was 6 years old. I didn’t understand what was happening. I was told we were moving and would be closer to Grandma and Grandpa. This excited me. I don’t recall feeling extraordinary loss at the time and it didn’t take long for my father to follow… Continue reading What I Never Wanted
In telling part of my story in a very public way for the first time I was able to chip away at some of the paralyzing fear he left me with.
I don’t think I have always been an anxious person. I am a high energy person and have been for as long as I can remember. For most of my adult life, though, I managed to hustle through the day and carve out 45 minutes to journal every night. I did it on minimal caffeine… Continue reading Me and Brené, Cultivating Calm and Stillness
Did you share a bedroom with a sibling? I did for the first twelve years of my life. When my mom bought us the house that I think of as home (my parents have moved twice since I moved out) I got to have my own room for the first time. I had dreamed about… Continue reading Me and Brené, Cultivating Creativity
When I left our family court hearing early last Friday morning I was frustrated to hear the decision would be mailed to us later that day. In 2015 it was to be mailed on actual paper with a stamp and all. My husband was away for work all week. I turned Aidan over to his… Continue reading Questioning My Faith in a Broken System
My dreams did not come true today. It was close. I learned about the Supreme Court ruling on marriage equality as I was in the car on my way home from the courthouse. I cried tears of relief, fear and happiness. As a proud advocate for LGBTQ rights for the whole of my adult life… Continue reading Practicing Faith and Authenticity in Family Court
I could not have planned the timing of this guidepost any better if I had tried. Even if I had tried it would have gotten thrown off by, yet another, adjournment request from opposing counsel. Two weeks ago my faith was waning and my intuition was being second guessed at every turn. To fill you… Continue reading Me and Brené, Cultivating Intuition and Trusting Faith
I am not a perfect mother. I am human. Very human. I do a lot right and am actually pretty proud of how I parent. The relationship my son, Aidan, and I have despite all we have been through (both together and apart) is solid. I’m highly impatient at the dinner table. It drives me… Continue reading If I Did One Thing Right As A Parent…
